goal: live it up.

I know....you don't....you.....you don't even have to say it. It's been a while. I miss you, blog. It's been far too long, and I desire to write, write, write all over you like I used to do!

Am I truly a senior this year? Is this SERIOUSLY my last year in this life at home? It's hard to believe- so hard that it really hasn't hit me yet. Emotionally, I'm so all over the place that it's like someone shoved me in a blender. One second I'm pitifully sentimental, already missing home, and then the next, I'm suffering from the most severe case of senioritis anyone has ever seen. Here's what I'm realizing though.

Senior year really is about living it up. I want to live it up with my family. Yes, I'll still see my family after I move out. Yes, I'll always be welcome at home. But no one can argue with the fact that, once I leave, it just won't be the same. I want to spend time with my family as a whole. I want to spend time with my brothers, individually. Maybe go grab some ice cream, or catch a movie. I want to take the time to enjoy and appreciate what I've been graciously given this year.

I want to live it up with my friends. Again, it won't be the same. However, that doesn't make these relationships any less meaningful. Relationships ARE worth it; that's something I've learned over time. I like to be what I call a "floater". The term is self explanatory- I like to float around, developing real relationships with as many people as I can. After all, you never know when you're making a lasting impact. You just can't assume anything based on how someone appears.

I want to live it up in my relationship with my Creator. Just think about it... how crazy is it that I just said that? That we even have that option- to develop a real relationship with the one who made us from dust? It's unbelievable, yet I so often let the craziness of my life push it aside.

Gah, I'm excited about college though. Not gonna lie.

-caylielane.